What are the attributes and characteristics of a daddy Dom?
Such a simple question and one that I have to give such a complicated answer to. But I think its best to clarify definition of terms
In the roots of language a “Dom” is an old english saxon word for law.. a dom is a decree or judgement. Some one who held control by law was said to hold dominion. They were in charge of the law and they dominated. ( dont worry theres a point to this – promise )
So to use that in context here.. In bdsm terms, the Dom is the lead partner in a power exchange relationship. The Dom uses his forces at his disposal to control, manipulate or train his submissives into obedience. Now, reflecting its medieval base roots, that typically means in mainstream bdsm a show of dark, sometimes brutish force, administering of punishments verbal or physical and removal of privileges to maintain discipline. It can be about manipulating social standing and /or removal of status. A Dom takes what he wants and what he needs from his submissive to suit his own agenda and a submissive knows their place and wants to please their Dom.
All well and good I hear you say.. but now answer the question!
A Daddy Dom, tends to put a more caring and nurturing aspect to those idea, it tends to be more about allowing growth of a submissive rather than containing them through the facade of growing up in family life. We can all relate to that as we’ve all done it.. where as hardly any of us have owned a slave. Don’t be fooled though Its still about control, its still about all those things but more day to day, more down to earth. A strict and guiding paternal figure who knows what’s best, knows right from wrong ,and guides his submissive baby girl or boy with compassion, lifting a lot of life’s burdens away from them. Not allowing them to come to harm or shielding them from potential hurt and pain. Daddy’s word is Law, his view point is the overriding one because he is in charge and looks out for his little one. So a Daddy Dom gets what he wants from giving to his submissive what she needs.
Now I know that sounds like topping from the bottom, and sometimes it is, but also its not. That black and white dynamic rarely exists, people are far too full of the shades of grey that has become sadly sickeningly popular recently. There is usually cross over, A Daddy Dom may not always relate to the master and slave dynamic of more traditional bdsm. But will usually use the same sort of techniques but not with the same levels and limits. Most of the time as both partners are consenting adults and they may flip into a more traditional role as Dom/Sub for harder aspects of play when needed. People and their needs shift and so their relationships do too. That is why there are Daddy’s or Daddy Dom’s or Daddy/Dom’s all of those are kind of placing themselves somewhere on the 0-100% scale of “Caring vs Control” as their personal preference.
Anyway.. a bit long winded.. but I hope it helps.
( a Daddy/Dom btw )