Well.. Id like to say in this modern world that – NO – gender fluidity wouldn’t or shouldn’t affect your chance of finding a Big.. either male or female to play with, but the sad fact is that it possibly may.

Basically speaking, it could be a limiting barrier for the potential carer to cross. The more masculine you look personally, then the harder a time you’ll have finding someone who can look through the obvious things that break the illusion, like a hairy back or a beard or big defined muscles. Its those manly markers that cause the problem. Its like you mention… when you tell them, they will look distantly into space and try to weigh up the idea, to run the picture of you as they stand infront of them there and then dressed in your civvies.. its the result they imagine which is breaking it for them. They just cant picture it. It crosses too many barriers for them. Its hard enough to get someone to cross the barrier of age at first that you should want to pretend to be a whole different gender. It opens too many questions for them. If they play with you when your pretending to be a girl, does that make them gay? Stupid huh? but thats how peoples minds work, thats the sort of socially embeded fears they experience and have to answer to themselves.

The truth is that your carer should care for you whoever you are or whatever you want to be. But they will need to know you first, to care for you as a whole person before they potentially allow those barriers to fall and accept you as you want to be. You should focus on building a solid simple relationship with a potential carer before you move on… because then they will be emotionally connected to you..and you will be accepted even if you want to dress as a small furry purple alien from alpha-centuri in a pink dress. Thats a thing right? Ive seen it on fetlife.

I know what Ive said doesnt really offer and solid solutions.. but instead merely offers a road map to the problems that you may face.. but I hope the follow up advice helps.

Daddy paul.

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